This Cape Cod Wedding minister/officiant reflects on Anticipation: The Groom

August is all about a sense of urgency and anticipation. Cape Cod is at full capacity as we reach mid -August. Everyone is eager to get their last huge dose of summer anticipating the onset of September and the beginning of the school year.

Last evening I presided over a wedding at Chatham Bars Inn . I don't have any photos yet but I am still on a high from the love I felt between this couple and their families. Love truly does transform everyone it touches!

Jeff and Lacy, the wedding party and many of the guests were from Austin,Texas. They were a great fun- loving crowd.The groomsmen including the groom's brother as best men, were trying in every way to keep the groom calm and happy as we waited. Kate, from CBI helped pin on the boutineirres made from a beautiful spray of blue thistle. I had the honor of helping with this ritual as well. I pinned the step-father and father who were waiting to walk the bride down the aisle after her grand entrance down those white steps from Shore Rd to the Boathouse. 

Here are some photos of groom and groomsmen. What a blast I had with Pavel and his brother and groomsmen before he wed his beautiful bride Anna on Summer Solstice at the The Cultural Center of Cape Cod.

The photos above are by Andrew Cavanaugh Photography

The photo below was an expectedly tender one as Sarah and Josh exchanged vows

 As the officiant I get to spend time waiting with the groom and his groomsmen right before the ceeremony. The myriad of ways the groomsmen attempt to ease the groom's jitters is always so dear and often amusing. I keep my counsel and distance but I do love those moments of anticipation.

Another great moment I shared with a groom and his men was at a wedding last month at beautiful Borsari Gallery in Dennis. We were waiting in the wine cellar and the groom was worried about his hands swelling and the ring not fitting. I showed him a stretching exercise and Bob Borsari and the best man immediately said,  "Jazz Hands."  So here is a pre-marital tip: Do "Jazz Hands" as you wait for the ceremony to begin and the ring slips right on the finger.

Watching the groom's face as his bride appears is also pure delight. Even if they have seen each other before at first look, there is that moment of her being escorted to him that speaks to an ancient and timeless rite of passage.

Every beginning contains an ending and every ending gives way to another beginning. So too with a wedding ceremony. So I encourage my couples to allow those feelings of anticipation to be. Yes, this sweet anticipation can feel like anxiety and of course there is that. No matter how many times we have run through the ceremony it doesn't really take. Let your self be presided over.

When I stopped in to check in on the bride she had just one question

"You will be telling me everything I need to do once I get up there ,won't you?"

"Yes, I will."  You could see the anxiety melt into sweet anticipation as she turned to have her photo taken holding up the shoes she was about to put on.  

"Yes, I will." I repeated as I crept off to hang with the groom and tell him exactly the same thing, more than once, in between group groomsmen hugs and a variety of other rituals. 

I have the groom's grandfather to thank for this referral and it was a pure pleasure to preside. Happy August YOU-LL

and don't worry- be married!

Kathleen