Who was St. Valentine? This wedding officiant /celebrant /minister

  just read, "Valentinus, aka St. Valentine, was licensed to marry people."(from My View by Barbara Leedom in today's Cape Cod Times.)  Sadly, the poor soul ended up in jail for presiding over weddings for Roman soldiers. The powers that be didn't like their soldiers to be married.  Valentine befriended his jailer and the jailer intoduced Valentinus to his blind daughter, Julia.

Val was nice enough to cure Julia of her blindness.  Then while on his way to the gallows, he penned her a letter, signing it, "Your Valentine."

Wow. If I've heard this legend before it didn't resonate. St. Valentine was one of us, a Wedding Officiant. You have gotta love that.  (Unfortunately for Val, the Romans in power didn't.)

With Valentine's day upon us romance is in air, red hearts everywhere and the subject of love- ubiquitous. From the mating habits of California Tree frogs (inside family joke) to hearing Daniel Jones, editor of the NY Times column, Modern Love talk about his new book, Love Illuminated..... my head is spinning with the subject of     (see below)

Happy Valentine's Day.

I need to rest my mind, awaken my heart, get off the computer and take a shower.

My husband has just come through the door bearing the most beautiful bouquet of flowers.

                   I wish you all mad love and sweet contentment. Who could ask for more.

               And for any of you who get engaged today hope I'll be hearing from you soon!

New Year- Race Point- National Seashore Nuptials

My husband and I went out to Race Point at the National Seashore in Provincetown on New Year's Day. It was spectacular so much clarity. Here are some photos from that day and some wedding memories from national seashore nuptials. We are so lucky to have this wild expanse of natural and national seashore in our province. Thank you Kennedys.

The Princess Bride

 I just love this photo of Teruka after she said, "I do" to Anthony Joseph last May at Land's End Inn. It was taken by the amazing Julia Cumes and captures such a perfect moment for this bride in all her nuptial glory! Gorgeous from head to toe!

Wedding Costs: An article from The Insider Magazine

 No, this couple is not studying their bills, Jillian and Chris are reviewing their vows before the ceremony. In lieu of wedding gifts this couple asked for donations to an orphange in Pune,India.

                                       

 

 Jenny Creno of The Insider magazine sent me this article about wedding costs. This was my response. So many of the couples who seek my services are first and foremost focussed on their ceremony. 

 

 The ceremony- that's what it's all about (sorry Hokey Pokey.)

 

http://www.creditcardinsider.com/insider/financial-advice-for-wedding-planning/

This was my response to the article.

 

Hello Jenny,

Such an important subject especially when the couple is paying for their own wedding and on a budget.  I was  disappointed to see that the ceremony got the smallest piece of the pie chart along with stationary and cost of alcohol.  (Though I'm in good company.) Without a decent ceremony the day starts off with a thud instead of a celebratory high note with bells ringing,birds singing - everyone is in the mood for love!

A ceremony is truly the centerpiece. The celebrants' words and his or her ability to allow the couple to be present to their moment, sets the tone for the entire wedding day. It is the celbrant's job to get it right so that the ceremony is uniquely theirs not just a fluffy confection of the same old, same old.

It seems so silly that the cake and candy counter costs more than the celebrant.

You should probably know some Rabbis charge 10% of the entire cost of the wedding so they would be taking quite a bigger chunk out of that pie chart.

I would say the average cost for a skilled officiant is @$400.00  ($66 less than a cake.)
(More for destination and if there is a rehearsal.)  I am always willing to work out something for a couple who truly are on a budget. My sweet simplicity ceremony is $275.00 .

Take a look at Jenny's article and check out that pie chart -see what you think.

http://www.creditcardinsider.com/insider/financial-advice-for-wedding-planning/

Writing your own vows- I Plight Thee my Troth

This Cape Cod Wedding Celebrant/officiant/interfaith minister often gets the question, "How do we write our own vows? I want to say something but my words just come out a jumble."

Love is hard to put into words but lets focus on vows. The essential vow in the marriage rite is the vow to remain faithful and true to the one you have chosen above all the rest.

This is so simple yet so profound.      "I plight (pledge) thee my Troth (Truth.)

Across all cultures and religions  this remains the truth of the marriage ceremony." I pledge to be true to you. I pledge my fidelity "-old fashion words that are essential to the rite of marriage.  With that said you have the freedom and creativity to express yourself and your love in a way that feels real and natural. 

When couples attempt to write their own vows it turns out what they usually want to express is the love in their hearts and the reason for their choice in marriage. This is perfectly fitting. In other words you are saying, "Here is why I chose you and here is what I promise.

If we cover the essential vow in your ceremony you are free to say what you feel, make some extra promises that are unique to your relationship. You can have some fun with this. It is said that the profound and sublime belly up to the same bar as the sweetly ridiculous. It is actually the halllmark of a true ceremony and real rite of passage.